Parenting Mistake #8 - Giving Too Many Directions at One Time

The best way to give directions is to phrase it in the positive (telling the child what to do and how to do it) in 3 steps or less. What exactly is a "step"? A step is one direction that breaks down an action into its simplest form.

Here are some examples of a broken down, one step direction. (All phrased in the positive-telling the child what to do and how to do it).

Stand up.

Lay down on your bed

Sit in the chair.

Walk to the door.

Here are some examples of a broken down, two step direction. (All phrased in the positive-telling the child what to do and how to do it).

Stand up, and walk to the door.

Lie down on your bed and close your eyes.

Sit in the chair and eat dinner.

Walk to the door and wait there.

Here are some examples of a broken down, three step direction. (All phrased in the positive-telling the child what to do and how to do it).

Stand up, walk to the door, and open it.

Lie down on your bed, close your eyes, and go to sleep.

Sit in the chair, eat dinner, and then clean up.

Walk to the door, wait there, and stand still.

To often parents are giving more than a 3 step directions and this makes it hard for your child or teen to know exactly what your expectation is.

In the beginning, breaking things down into steps will require effort on your part. As time goes on, you will automatically begin to feel comfortable breaking everything down to its simplest steps. It will not only make your life more efficient, your child/teen will do these things independently and without resistance, once he/she can form the habit. Habits will only be formed once the child learns the daily routines are broken down and predictable.